I hear the same sentence in many different forms: ‘I really want to lose weight, but part of me just does not want to.’ People usually say it as if it proves they are weak. I hear it as useful information. It means there is more than one thing going on, and each of those things has its reasons.
In hypnotherapy this is called parts work. It sounds technical, but it is how most of us already talk about ourselves. The trick is to take it seriously and get curious about what each part wants.
The comfort seeker, the feeder and the logical one
In my recordings I give these parts plain names. There is often a logical part that knows exactly what to eat. There may be a part that wants to sit on the sofa with a takeaway, which people sometimes label lazy, though it is usually after rest or comfort. Some people also have a feeder, a part that uses food to look after them or others.
The logical part usually gets all the credit and the others get the blame. That rarely works. If you treat a part as an enemy, it digs in. If you ask what it is trying to do for you, the answer is often surprising.
You might recognise a different cast. Some people have a rebel that hates being told what to do, or a worrier that eats when anxious. The names matter less than the curiosity.
Every part has a job
The part that wrecks a good week with a big weekend may be protecting you from burnout. After days of strict effort, it pulls the handbrake. The part that snacks every evening may be trying to bring some joy into a flat day. These are reasonable aims. The method is what causes the trouble.
This is also why fighting harder rarely helps. The more pressure the logical part applies, the harder the protective part pushes back. Lowering the pressure, oddly enough, often makes it easier to keep high standards.
Once you see the aim, the conversation changes. You are no longer trying to get rid of a part. You are asking it to keep its job and find a better way of doing it. Rest can come from an early night. Joy can come from people, music or being outside. The part still gets what it wants, and you stop feeling at war with yourself.
Something to try this week
Next time you notice the ‘part of me’ feeling, give that part a name and write down one line: what is it trying to get for me right now? Comfort, rest, fun, a reward, a break from pressure.
Then ask whether there is a second way to give it that, even a small one. You do not need to act on the answer straight away. Simply knowing the aim tends to take the heat out of the urge.
Over a few days you may notice the same part turning up at the same times. That pattern is worth knowing.
Episodes to listen to
Each of these sessions uses parts work in its own way. They are longer than most of my recordings, so pick a time when you will not be interrupted.
Weight Loss Hypnosis to Reduce the Stress and Pressure of Losing Weight
In a hut on an imagined beach you meet the part that pushes you towards indulgent food, the one people label as lazy. The session recasts it as a protector that has been trying to stop you burning out, then pairs it with a part that holds high standards so the two can work as a team.
Good if you swing between strict effort and blow-outs.
A Joyful Way To Lose Weight with Hypnosis
After a restful pool scene, this session takes you back to a quiet village from your childhood, where you meet the part linked to snacking and cravings. You thank it, learn that it was after joy all along, and help it take on a new role: finding pleasure you will still feel good about a few hours later.
Good if you feel guilty and self-critical after a craving.
Losing Weight Hypnosis: The Vision to Lose Weight
This one splits the mind into a logical part busy with a puzzle, a resourceful part that wants change, and the conscious you, resting in the background. While the logical part is occupied, you reconnect with times you have already shown self-control, link that feeling to a simple image, and step into a future where good choices feel normal.
Good if you know you have had willpower before and want it back.
Common questions
What is parts work in hypnotherapy?
Parts work treats different urges and feelings as separate parts of you, each with its own aim. In a session you might speak to the part that wants to snack and find out what it is trying to achieve. The aim is cooperation between parts rather than a fight.
Why do I sabotage my own weight loss?
Often a part of you is trying to meet a real need, such as rest, comfort or fun, and food is the quickest way it knows. Calling it sabotage makes it feel like a failing. Many people find it easier to change once they understand what that part is after.
Is parts work the same as having a split personality?
No, parts work is simply a way of describing ordinary mixed feelings, like wanting to go out and wanting to stay in at the same time. Everyone has them. Giving them names makes them easier to understand and talk to.
Please read
Hypnosis works with habits, feelings and attention. It is not medical treatment and does not replace your GP. If you have, or think you may have, an eating disorder, or you are pregnant, diabetic or taking weight-loss medicine, please speak to your GP first. Beat, the UK eating disorder charity, is on 0808 801 0677. The podcast sessions are for adults: listen somewhere comfortable, never while driving. If eating ever feels like more than a habit, for example regular bingeing or feeling out of control around food, the right first step is your GP or Beat, the UK eating disorder charity, on 0808 801 0677.
Where to go from here
Listen on The Hypnotist Podcast
Every session above is free to hear on The Hypnotist Podcast, along with more than 200 other weight and eating episodes.
Is hypnosis right for you?
Take my free four minute suitability test. You get an honest answer about whether hypnotherapy is likely to help with your goals, and how.
Prefer to talk it through? Book a consultation call and use code SLIM at checkout for half price: £24.50 instead of £49 (or $29.50 outside the UK).
More on this topic: emotional eating.